:sheepish: :"Yes, Ogre's Bane is has a +3 modifier to ogres and giants."

:"I don't understand what any of that means. Can it make mincemeat of them or not?"

:"It can, but you're dealing with a whole crowd of them. Discretion is the better part of valor."

:"As your Dungeon Master, I advise you that your chances of surviving this fight are slim."

:"Roll the dice to see if we can slip by."

:"Don't let them roll off the table this time."

"..."
*ROLL*
:"Fifteen!"

:"Let me calculate the results. Your character class is Bunnymancer so that's a +5 to stealth..."

:"Using your class skills, you softly step on past the ogres without making a sound."

:"The bunnies have trained me well!"

:"This is so exciting!"

:"Pffft! It's all make-believe. What's so dramatic about all of this?"

:"You want to keep playing or not?"

:"Oh, Sure! Sure!"

:"The dungeon continues on into the distance ... you follow it until you come to a rather well reinforced door built into the side of the stone hallway."

:"-The basement of your librarytreehouse is a
really good stand in for a dungeon-"

:"You'd think this door would be locked, but it's actually wide open, and you can see a room beyond."

:"Hmmmmmm .... what's in this room?"

:"There's a burlap sack in the center of the room. It's been ripped open and some of its treasure is spilling out."

:"What kinda treasure, specifically?"

:"The sort of stuff Rarity would like. Gems, a few golden coins."

:"But wait, there's also a full set of shiny new armor in there! It makes the armor Rainbow is wearing look like heavy rusty crap. This stuff looks like it was worn by a palace guard ..."

:"My Make-Believe Armor is Not Rusty Crap!"

:"... but I am
all about upgrades!"

:"Are you speaking in or out of character, here? Are you into the armor, or is your character?"

:"Both! Now, tell me more about this armor."

:"Okay... it's quite complete and rather intimidating, a set of four greaves, neck and chest guard. Wing holes in the back. Built with mithril alloy, it's light, but strong and will never rust."

:"Does it have spiky pauldrons and a sallet helmet with visor?"

:"Sure, why not?"

:"Been reading books about armor, Rainbow?"

:"I like what I like!"

:"Moving on ... there is something strange about this armor."

:"The way it's stacked on the floor looks like it wasn't taken off by the previous owner, instead it looks like he or she was
bodily teleported out of it. It's unsettling."

:"Something fishy is going on over here. Rainbow, it's obviously a trap!"

:"Yeah, well, I can fly right in, grab the chest, and fly out before I can get caught by whatever's in there to get me."

:"You sure about that?"

:"Let 'er rip!"

"Uh, when your dungeon master is asking if you're sure about something, she's kinda nudging you out of harm's way, so your game doesn't end abruptly ... if you get my meaning."

:"I'm not leaving tonight until my character gets to wear that armor."

:"I have a bad feeling about this."

:"Rainbow, the Pegasus Knight, flies into the room. But as soon as she lays hoof on the shiny silver armor, the heavy door magically slams shut with a deafening crash, trapping her inside.

:"Oh man..."

:"Can Rainbow hear me through the door if I shout loud enough?"

:"I'll allow it."

:"
RAINBOW SIT TIGHT! I'LL TRY TO PICK THE LOCK ON THE DOOR!"

:"AUGH! I'm sitting right here!"

:"Role playing!"

:"Your lock picking skills aren't the best, and besides you're using your hooves, so you need at least an eighteen."
~ROLL~
:"Five. Sorry, Rainbow."

:"The bunnies never taught you lock picking, did they?"

:"no."

:"Okay. I go up on my forelegs and try to buck the door down."

:"
*KABLAMMO*"

:"Uh right. Rolling the dice ..."

:"Twenty!"

:"AWW YEAH!"

:"Hold on a second, let me look up the rules for breaking down doors."

:"
Rules for breaking down doors? There's rules for
everything in this darn game."

:"Yup! And this game has a few of my own additions of my own just to cover all the corner cases!"

:"So, let's see. Natural twenty ... multiply by the strength modifier ... that was a fourth class iron reinforced wooden door on steel hinges... carry the five..."

:"The enchanted trap door shatters into a billion little matchsticks at the force of Rainbow's sheer awesome-ness."

:"The door shudders and cracks on its hinges, but doesn't break. The room vibrates with the force of her blow. Rainbow feels like she'd just kicked a stone wall as hard as she could. She goes sprawling on her back, stunned."

:"What the hell? You're just making it rough on me."

:"It's a trap door, it's supposed to keep you trapped. That's what it does. I expected you to recognize that it
was a trap and try to go about trying to take the bait without getting caught IN the trap. I had a whole scenario planned out, but
you just blundered right into-"

:"Well... well my character likes armor!"

:"Moving on..."

:"The force of Rainbow kicking the door reverberates throughout the dark dungeon room and shakes something that was stuck to the ceiling. Suddenly you hear a loud farting *splat* from the corner of the room."

:"Oh no! What could it be?"

:"A creature known as the Gelatinous Rhombus."

:"Cool! What's it looks like?"

:"It is a monster made out of angular gelatin, slightly glowing a pale green with a slight scent of blueberry pie. The monster manual has a picture."

:"That's clearly a gelatinous cube, Twilight."

:"To the untrained eye, yes. But if you got out your protractor, you'd notice that the angles are not exactly ninety degrees, so
technically it's a rhombus."

:"Oh! Well maybe it knows the way out of this room. If you could just ask nicely..."

:"I think it's completely brainless."

:"Rainbow! You might hurt the poor things's feelings! Be nice to the cube!"

:"*ahem* The
rhombus moves slowly, but persistently towards Rainbow. Just between you and me, you might not want to come in contact with it."

:"What's that crap floating around inside it?"

: "Wait, I'm a Bunnymancer, right?"

:"Technically, you're a Beast Master who'd specialized in small to medium rodents. Capybaras, Beavers, Rabbits, Nutria..."

:"I prepare the Bunnymancer spell necessary to bring forth an ARMY of Bouncing Baby Bunnies and I
command them to dig Rainbow out of the room!"

:"You cast 'Summon Bunnies'? "

:".... uh huh."

:"Immediately you can hear thousands of tiny paws scrabbling at the dirt all around you. This dungeon is fairly deep, so it'll be a few minutes, before they get down to our level."

:"Don't worry, Rainbow. The bunnies are coming. Just sit tight."

:"Oh, perfect."

:"The gelatinous rhombus lurches towards Rainbow, filling her field of vision. The sickly sweet smell of canned blueberries is everywhere. A blob of it grazes Rainbow's tail and part of it melts away like candy floss in water."

:"Oh dang it!"

:"Look out, Rainbow!"

:''Your dang bunnies aren't going to get here quickly enough!"

:"
Imaginary bunnies!"

:"Okay ... okay ... I'm going to fly up into the air and ram the door as hard as I can. You said it cracked when I hit it the first time, it's not going to survive another."

:"Trust the bunnies, Rainbow."

:"I'm doing it."

:"Rolling the dice ..."

:"And?"

:"Rainbow flies up and with blinding speed, she crashes straight into the door. It cracks in two, but uh... Rainbow bounces off it."

:"And straight into the center of the Gelatinous Rhombus."

:"
NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

:"Why can't you ponies play your stupid game without shouting at the top of your lungs all the time?! I'm trying to sleep!"

:"Spike! I forgot all about you! Sorry!"

:"What's with Rainbow?"

:"Her character met with an unseemly demise."

:"I don't want to talk about it."

:"Sure. Right. Anyway, Pinkie dropped off a bunch of leftovers from some party of hers, have a look in the fridge."

:"Do you think a snack would cheer you up?"

:"Sh-sh-sure..."

:"Oh wow! There's cake and little pimento sandwiches and even a jello mold with little bits of pineapple and maraschino cherries floating around in it!"

:"I'm not a piece of pineapple."

:"I'm not even going to ask!"

:"Oh... oh! I didn't think that. It was just so insensitive of me!"

:"How about we call this Oubliette and Ogres game as done and pick up something else?"

:"Dragons and Dragons?"

:"I've had enough dungeon crawling for a day."

:"Well, um. I figured Twilight's campaign would be ending early...

:"I am tough, but fair!"

:"So, I brought along something that my animal friends like when
we have game nights."

:"And that is?"